"How are you?" is a nice question. It's a friendly way that people in the USA greet each other. But "How are you?" is also a very unusual question. It's a question that often doesn't need an answer. The person who asks "How are you?" hopes to hear the answer "Fine", even if the person's friend isn't fine. The reason is that "How are you?" isn't really a question and "Fine" isn't really an answer. They are simply other ways of saying "Hello" or "Hi".

Sometimes, people don't say exactly what they mean. For example, when someone asks "Do you agree?", the other person might think, "No, I disagree. I think you're wrong..." But it isn't very polite to disagree so strongly, so the other person might say "I'm not sure." It's a nicer way to say that you don't agree with someone.

People don't say exactly what they are thinking when they want to finish talking with other people. For example, many talks over the phone finish when one person says "I've to go now." Often, the person who wants to hang up gives an excuse: "Someone's at the door." "Something is burning on the stove." The excuses might be real, or not. Perhaps the person who wants to hang up simply doesn't want to talk any more, but it isn't polite to say that. The excuse is more polite, and it doesn't hurt the other person.

Whether they are greeting each other, talking about an idea, or finishing a talk, people don't say exactly what they are thinking. It's an important way that people try to be nice to each other, and it's part of the game of language.

One day, I heard an American boy say to a Chinese girl student," You speak very good English." But the girl answered," No, no. My English is very poor." The foreigner was quite surprised at the answer. Thinking he had not made 1understood or the girl had not heard him clearly, he said," Yes, indeed, you speak very well."2the girl still kept saying," No." In the end the American boy could not understand and didn't know3to say.

What's wrong with the girl's answer? She didn't 4a compliment (恭维)in the same way as the American people do. She should answer, "Thank you" instead of "No". She 5understood what the American boy had said, but she thought she should be modest. In the6, people will feel proud and confident when they are praised. So if someone says the 7you have cooked are very delicious, you should say," Thank you."

In our country we think being modest is a virtue (美德) and being proud is a bad thing, but in my opinion, being confident does not8being proud, so sometimes you should be confident9being modest. If you are modest and say, "No, I'm afraid I can't do it well", while working in a western country, the others may think that you really cannot do it. If you often say "No", you will certainly be looked down upon by others. When asking for a job, if one says something like "Yes, I can certainly do it" instead of" Let me have a try", he or she will 10 get it. So in the west, you should be brave to show your self-confidence.

—Have a good trip!